The very many questions-not-worth-their-own-thread question thread XXXI

[Samson]

Oh, I know the practical reason for not making things hard(er) for left-handed soldiers, my question was a separate one: why are there so many left-handed people in the US?

I was supprised to find that there are more in the US than some other countries:
Source

throughout history there was a great deal of bias and stigma associated with being left-handed and lefties were forced to use their right hands
...
Only in recent years North America and Western Europe have taken a more liberal stance on handedness and permitted children to use their naturally dominant hand. The rates of lefties in these countries tend to be higher, approximately 12%. In Asian, Muslim and Latin American counties the rates tend to be lower. In countries where children are still forced to stop using their dominant left hand such as Korea (2%), Japan (3%) and Taiwan (5%) you will find the lowest percentage of lefties.

 

[EgonSpengler]

Oh, I know the practical reason for not making things hard(er) for left-handed soldiers, my question was a separate one: why are there so many left-handed people in the US?

Oh, I see. No idea. Maybe it has something to do with individualist vs collectivist cultures? I can imagine that some parts a child's culture have an effect on them before their hand-preference is evident. for instance, I think we (Americans? people in general? I'm not sure) begin to instill gender norms in infants, long before gender is relevant.

 

[yung.carl.jung]

I found this discussion very interesting, I just read it and would now like to revive it.

To the extroverts on here: how exactly do you engage girls (or even guys) in several hours of conversation? I see this happening all the time, but I've never been able to reach the five minute mark.

Which is very odd, considering you are far from a boring person and have a lot of non-standard views you seem to be very passionate about. I imagine with the right person you could talk for hours and hours without ever having an awkward pause.

I can be absolutely horrible at small talk. But if there's a natural topic I'm ok I guess. Depends on my co-talker. If it's a fellow poor small-talker, the conversation be crammed with awkward silences. But women are generally better at talking than men.

I disagree, men and women just talk differently. I would say that for women it is easier to overcome the stage of small talk and engage in "real talk", e.g. talking about feelings, fears, controversial opinions and so forth.

It's not awkwardness I'm concerned about, it's what you could possibly fill hours of conversation with.

Things you are passionate about, obviously. No one makes smalltalk for hours. Either you take it to the next level or the conversation ends and you leave.

Is that how you recall meeting your girlfriend? Information-dumping about obscure topics?

I fell in love with my girlfriend of 3 years when she schooled me on a comment I made about Dostoyewski's "The Gambler", I mixed up a character name. We've been together since that exact day, first time I met. Pretty sure that counts as obscure.

I really hate public gatherings and parties (I'm talking fiery hate). I'm not an extrovert and I don't feed off of social interaction. Ideally I'd talk to a girl alone, but it's pretty much impossible to find yourself in that situation.

Yes, I know how this works, I just don't like it. I don't find shows, music or movies interesting topics, I don't care about psychology (in fact I hold the field in contempt). It's possible that I'm just not finding a girl with similar interests, but I don't know how I can. The only kinds of girls in bars are those I probably have nothing in common with already, so your advice would just make my dating life worse.

So how about trying to meet people with similar hobbies? You seem passionate about music, why not go to shows and try to talk to girls after? If it's an artist you're really into you already have something to talk about.

There are girls in every obscure niche interest in the entire world. I've met girls who are Nietzsche scholars. I've talked to girls about free-jazz and neofolk. I have a feeling you are looking in the wrong places- A college party or a bar might not be the best place to have an interesting conversation

 

[Hygro]

To the extroverts on here: how exactly do you engage girls (or even guys) in several hours of conversation? I see this happening all the time, but I've never been able to reach the five minute mark.

Practice makes perfect. And have fun goddammit.

edit: nice timing yung jung

 

[Takhisis]

Oh, I see. No idea. Maybe it has something to do with individualist vs collectivist cultures?

Hmmm… putting that next to Samson's post is food for thought indeed.

 

[Mouthwash]

Which is very odd, considering you are far from a boring person and have a lot of non-standard views you seem to be very passionate about. I imagine with the right person you could talk for hours and hours without ever having an awkward pause.

I'm a lot less articulate IRL, though. She might have to do most of the talking, which (from what I gather) is not how the bonding ritual usually works.

I fell in love with my girlfriend of 3 years when she schooled me on a comment I made about Dostoyewski's "The Gambler", I mixed up a character name. We've been together since that exact day, first time I met. Pretty sure that counts as obscure.

Like I said, I'm not in university and won't be soon. I can't just find girls on the street who are intellectuals.

You seem passionate about music, why not go to shows and try to talk to girls after?

I don't really enjoy talking about music, I don't even listen to rap anymore.

There are girls in every obscure niche interest in the entire world. I've met girls who are Nietzsche scholars. I've talked to girls about free-jazz and neofolk. I have a feeling you are looking in the wrong places- A college party or a bar might not be the best place to have an interesting conversation

There's a university town a half hour away from where I am. I've visited the library (which is the easiest place to get English history books), but everyone there is working on something. I really don't get how I am going to meet anybody like that.

 

[dusters]

I met my gf on a blogging site. I started to comment on something on her blog and turned out she decided we should meet so I teach her some chess.

 

[Lexicus]

There's a university town a half hour away from where I am. I've visited the library (which is the easiest place to get English history books), but everyone there is working on something. I really don't get how I am going to meet anybody like that.

One thing you might try is to see if there are any clubs or groups centered around things you're interested in. And, like I said before, try yoga classes. Seriously.

 

[Farm Boy]

If you're looking for people with whom to form emotional bonds, try activities people engage in that are emotional(bonus if the activity itself takes the pressure off to talk all the time)? Even better if it involves a baseline of physical activity to get the blood flowing. I would tend to think of things like: join a choir, regularly attend a religious service, rock climbing club/skydiving club, mission/nonprofit work like disaster cleanup/habitat for humanity. Also, don't just look for desirable specimens of a specific gender and age group as conversation partners. Emotional bonds come with networks attached, and forming/maintaining them is a skill that requires practice. Bar/party scene sucks for meeting people. Tolerable for going to with people whose company you already enjoy.

 

[The_J]

Best things are the things where you a) work in groups/are forced to interact b) go regularly.
Any of the hobbies Farm Boy suggested will do, as do many others.
I meet people, because I meet people. I go to the gym, I go to dance class, I go to parties.
If you meet the same people at multiple places, you'll at some point will talk to each other, if you recognize each other.
Dance and yoga classes are obviously great for that.
But it takes time, can take pretty long. But you're also extending your circle of friends/acquaintances, which helps you again to get to know more people.
And at some point it'll work out .

 

[Cutlass]

Popular Mechanics, 22 January 2017: The Sig P320 is the U.S. Army's new sidearm

Any current or former soldiers here? Is this a good upgrade? And how important is a handgun for a modern soldier?

I'm not a gun guy, but it sounds like the insane process of selecting the new gun (criticized by just about everyone, including the former Secretary of Defense and the Army Chief of Staff) may have resulted in something positive.

According to the article, the Beretta M9, used by the US military for many years, is less than beloved.






The Sig Sauer P320 beat out the Beretta APX, the CZ P-09, the FN Herstal Five-Seven Mk.2, the General Dynamics/Smith & Wesson M&P, and the Glock 17. I don't know anything about any of them, although the article notes the Glock 17 is used by the UK armed forces. Also, this article doesn't mention it, but I read somewhere else that the P320 can be changed from 9mm to .45 fairly easily. I don't know if that has any utility to US soldiers, though.

Dumbasses never should have stopped using the 1911.

 

[Cutlass]

How the hell does the US manage to have so many left-handed people that this is a necessity?

Or right handed soldiers who's right hand is injured or otherwise occupied.....

 

[Valka D'Ur]

I'm a lot less articulate IRL, though. She might have to do most of the talking, which (from what I gather) is not how the bonding ritual usually works.

The quality of what gets said is more important than how many words are used to say it. Just don't give the impression that you're not listening. That's a great way to kill a conversation.

Like I said, I'm not in university and won't be soon. I can't just find girls on the street who are intellectuals.

How intellectual do you want them to be? Abstract-intellectual, or carry on a conversation about serious topics-intellectual?

Something to take note of: A sure way to lose my interest in any conversation here on the forum is to start posting graphs and charts all over the place. If you do the equivalent in a RL conversation, I predict that conversation won't go much farther - unless she's into statistics.

There's a university town a half hour away from where I am. I've visited the library (which is the easiest place to get English history books), but everyone there is working on something. I really don't get how I am going to meet anybody like that.

Are there any social activities at the library, like a book discussion group? The library in my city allows people to play board games (very quietly). I've played Scrabble there and I noticed that if people want to play chess, the library will provide a set to use.

Does your community have any writing groups? I know you're into that, and a lot of communities do have groups that get together for RL NaNoWriMo meetups. It's usually at a coffee shop or maybe a book store (if the store provides a social area), and people bring their laptops and spend the time writing, discussing stories, and bouncing ideas off each other. The person who got me started doing NaNo lives in Kentucky, and he's described events like these - they sound like fun.

Some of the best conversations I've had have been in book stores. You never know what's going to spark a conversation - a comment to another customer about an author or book is usually all it takes. And if it goes well, that conversation could end up being taken out to the nearest food court or coffee kiosk. Then if you're comfortable enough to trade email addresses, who knows - you may have made a friend who could become more than a friend later.

 

[Mouthwash]

The quality of what gets said is more important than how many words are used to say it.

But I don't know what to say. Everything just flies out of my head when I speak.

How intellectual do you want them to be? Abstract-intellectual, or carry on a conversation about serious topics-intellectual?

Anything. Nothing's a bigger turn-off than the giggly airheads other guys seem to like. But I have a policy of not discussing intellectual things outside of writing format because every time I try I inevitably wind up looking like an idiot. I'm looking for something that I can't provide myself and that's not a good strategy, is it?

Are there any social activities at the library, like a book discussion group? The library in my city allows people to play board games (very quietly). I've played Scrabble there and I noticed that if people want to play chess, the library will provide a set to use.

I meant the university library. Israel has much smaller libraries than the US does and the giant bookstores with coffee shops attached don't exist.

 

[Hygro]

But I don't know what to say. Everything just flies out of my head when I speak.

Anything. Nothing's a bigger turn-off than the giggly airheads other guys seem to like. But I have a policy of not discussing intellectual things outside of writing format because every time I try I inevitably wind up looking like an idiot. I'm looking for something that I can't provide myself and that's not a good strategy, is it?

http://hotelconcierge.tumblr.com/post/140529495929/how-to-be-attractive

 

[Traitorfish]

>link titled "how to be attractive"
>big picture of Charles I

Not sure exactly what we're meant to infer from that.

 

[REDY]

What is the green card? It still offers to me in ads.

 

[W|M]

>link titled "how to be attractive"
>big picture of Charles I

Not sure exactly what we're meant to infer from that.

He's considered attractive because he was a hipster; His royal head got chopped off before it was cool

 

[Mouthwash]

http://hotelconcierge.tumblr.com/post/140529495929/how-to-be-attractive

That's surprisingly insightful (probably more so than everything said on this thread combined) but I already know most of it. My problem is that I just don't know how to physically find girls. Tell me where to find people I have a lot in common with, point me in the direction to walk, and I'll go.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

But I don't know what to say. Everything just flies out of my head when I speak.

I don't think there's a person on the planet this hasn't happened to.

Anything. Nothing's a bigger turn-off than the giggly airheads other guys seem to like. But I have a policy of not discussing intellectual things outside of writing format because every time I try I inevitably wind up looking like an idiot. I'm looking for something that I can't provide myself and that's not a good strategy, is it?

I'm going to ask: What do you consider to be an "intellectual thing"? Is it politics? Science? Literature? There are ways to have an interesting conversation about these topics without it getting too bogged-down.

I meant the university library. Israel has much smaller libraries than the US does and the giant bookstores with coffee shops attached don't exist.

I was thinking of the Chapters/Starbucks combination that we have in one of the shopping districts here. These places aren't really big and I don't really care for Starbucks myself (not a coffee & muffin person), but for those who are, it's nice to get a snack and go sit by the fireplace in the store's lounge area. They allow people to sit and read, and sometimes there are book club activities or author signings there.

This is in Canada; I assume that such places exist in the U.S. But do you mean that your library has no social area at all - that it's all books and tables and computers?