Your opinion on Santa Claus, and other stories.

[sophie]

I'm not sure I follow.

He's pointing out, in a more flippant manner than I was (less so than Masada was), that childhood really is nothing more than a series of lies told you by your parents. I mean, did your parents tell you that you weren't, in fact going to be a president/astronaut/whatever you wanted to be if you worked hard enough, and actually told you you were going to do reasonably well in high school, go to a good but not great university, get a bachelors and work in a cubicle at a white collar job not actually utilizing any of the skills you spent the last 20 years honing, and will be stuck in that box for the next 30 until you retire? Because mine sure as hell didn't, and I'm really grateful for that.

My point is the reaction this thread has generated is ridiculous. You're supposed to lie to your kids in these situations, as maintaining the naïveté of a young child is a lot more enjoyable to parent (and frankly a lot better for the child in the long run) than being a brutally blunt ass of a parent that creates a jaded cynical ass of a kid by the time they're 6.

The last thing I'll say to this is kids, in my experience, don't generally like having everything told to them straight up. You can't make a child like, believe (I mean truly believe), or enjoy anything just through sheer force of will; and parenting to me isn't about this at all. A good parent doesn't beat morals into children, a good parent will create a household environment in which the notion of non-good morals hasn't even crossed their mind, or if it has, the right answer is immediately obvious. The trick is letting them discover the right choices (or right music, right interests, what have you) on their own, because a child who is being forcefed something, in my experience, will be as stubborn as a mule, and every bit as unpleasant.

*EDIT* Hilariously enough, I just realized that my whole conception of being a good parent is quite literally tricking your kids into liking everything you like!

 

[Whiskey_Lord]

I believe my original quote was, "why tell your kids pointless lies?" The lies you're talking about certainly aren't pointless, for the most part. Santa Claus is, though.

 

[LucyDuke]

That is exactly what i would do. Plus being a Christian I will tell the real reason why we have Christmas.

I wonder what we'd have if we didn't.

 

[Terxpahseyton]

As Owen said, you don't want your kid to be a pessimistic cynic with the age of six. I have read numerous times that the most important base of a solid and positive personality is love and trust. And this I believe also benefits from a world crafted by fairy tales, magic and so on. Additionally this I hope can also lay the seed for a sense that seeks for something greater than what we immediately see. By that I don't mean metaphysics, but ideals.
On the other hand, when my child was old enough to know the truth about Santa and other fairy tales, I would explain my decision to tell my kids these lies and from then on forward would like to gradually introduce it to the complexity and shadiness of the world. I accept illusion as an important factor to craft the foundation of a personality, but further down the road I see it as a burden and/or the sub-optimal solution.

 

[Ziggy Stardust]

I wonder what we'd have if we didn't.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinterklaas

And he kicks Santa's arse.

 

[LucyDuke]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinterklaas

And he kicks Santa's arse.

Does that story predate the Jesus one?

 

[Darkwind]

You don't need to know anything about Jesus or Santa Claus to celebrate Christmas. At least that's how it is in mainland China. (The malls celebrate it with Christmas sales, while most people are atheists and have never read one sentence in bible.)

So yes, why lie to your kids?

 

[Perfection]

For my kids I wouldn't care that much either way. I'll probably leave it up to their mother.

 

[puglover]

My point is the reaction this thread has generated is ridiculous. You're supposed to lie to your kids in these situations, as maintaining the naïveté of a young child is a lot more enjoyable to parent (and frankly a lot better for the child in the long run) than being a brutally blunt ass of a parent that creates a jaded cynical ass of a kid by the time they're 6.

This is a false dilemma. There aren't just two choices in the Santa question: 1) tell your kids a fun lie or 2) be a brutally blunt parent who creates cynical, jaded children. It's not going to damage a kid psychologically to just never say Santa is real. When the kid asks, just saying "It's a nice story," isn't going to create a jaded adult, but simply a kid who finds other neat stories to believe in that actually have plausiblity.

 

[sophie]

This is a false dilemma. There aren't just two choices in the Santa question: 1) tell your kids a fun lie or 2) be a brutally blunt parent who creates cynical, jaded children. It's not going to damage a kid psychologically to just never say Santa is real. When the kid asks, just saying "It's a nice story," isn't going to create a jaded adult, but simply a kid who finds other neat stories to believe in that actually have plausiblity.

This is more in a response to the posters on this thread; the majority of whom were about being brutally honest to their kids.

 

[Ramius75]

I will tell them, they will know it when they get older.

 

[Ziggy Stardust]

Does that story predate the Jesus one?

Not sure, when was the Jesus story made up again?

He did survive a war on Sinterklaas though. When he kicked Calvinist arse. Jesus has not been able to yet to win his war.

 

[Narz]

This is a false dilemma. There aren't just two choices in the Santa question: 1) tell your kids a fun lie or 2) be a brutally blunt parent who creates cynical, jaded children. It's not going to damage a kid psychologically to just never say Santa is real. When the kid asks, just saying "It's a nice story," isn't going to create a jaded adult, but simply a kid who finds other neat stories to believe in that actually have plausiblity.

Good post.

I'm all for make believe but why pretend it's real? Kids have enough imagination on their own, I'm not going to sell them on a stupid myth about a fat old man who enjoys breaking & entering and paying for presents for children with parents who can afford gifts (Santa never seems to get around to the truly needy somehow).

 

[LucyDuke]

Not sure, when was the Jesus story made up again?

He did survive a war on Sinterklaas though. When he kicked Calvinist arse. Jesus has not been able to yet to win his war.

Dunno. I assume around year 0, since that's when everyone started talking about it.

 

[ParadigmShifter]

There was no year 0, hunnibunz.

 

[Kyriakos]

No reason to lie, and on top of that press the kid to see positively some old man with a beard who supposedly wants to give it a present.

 

[Lone Wolf]

I'm all for make believe but why pretend it's real?

Signed here. I was a rather dreamy, non-cynical kid, and I didn't believe in actual existence of old men with presents at all.

 

[Haseri]

Maybe it's because I grew up in a house full of children, damn skippy I'm going to tell my kids there's a Santa. Mostly for fun, mostly for this reason.

 

[LucyDuke]

There was no year 0, hunnibunz.

D'ja know what I mean?

 

[Terxpahseyton]

mostly for this reason.

That was beautiful. (and I just now realized that I already sort of stated that myself, but I needed that clip to emotionally get behind it)