Cow me

[JollyRoger]

Karalysia had two cows, but sat for the LSAT and then had 6 cows:

At a state fair, the prize-winning cows of six different breeds, Ayrshire, Brown Swiss, Guernsey, Jersey, Holstein, and Simmental, are to be displayed in the central stock pavilion. There are six stalls numbered 1 to 6 from left to right. Each cow will be housed in its own stall.

The Jersey is not in either the leftmost or rightmost stall.

There are exactly two cows between the Holstein and the Simmental.

The Brown Swiss and Jersey are next to each other.

The Guernsey is in stall three.

If the Ayrshire cow is next to the Simmental cow, which of the following cannot be true:

(A) The Jersey cow is next to the Holstein.
(B) The Guernsey is next to the Ayrshire.
(C) The Ayrshire cow is in stall two.
(D) The Simmental cow is in stall four.
(E) The Holstein is in stall four.

Once the score came back, he had a cow.

 

[Traitorfish]

Taillesskangaru has two cows. The emus get them.

 

[GhostWriter16]

Traitorfish has a cow named Traitor and a cow named Fish. Traitor betrayed Fish, as was his nature, and fried fish into a traitor, since he realized he could trust nobody. Thus, Traitorfish was born

 

[Ajidica]

Ajidica has two cows. They killed him for crimes against the state.

What did I ever do to you?

taillesskangaru had two cows. Turned out to be two criminal kangaroos. Why?
He lives in Australia.

 

[Chairman Meow]

Ajidica has two cows. They learned Latin and can now talk to every ancient Roman they meet.

 

[Karalysia]

Karalysia had two cows, but sat for the LSAT and then had 6 cows:

At a state fair, the prize-winning cows of six different breeds, Ayrshire, Brown Swiss, Guernsey, Jersey, Holstein, and Simmental, are to be displayed in the central stock pavilion. There are six stalls numbered 1 to 6 from left to right. Each cow will be housed in its own stall.

The Jersey is not in either the leftmost or rightmost stall.

There are exactly two cows between the Holstein and the Simmental.

The Brown Swiss and Jersey are next to each other.

The Guernsey is in stall three.

If the Ayrshire cow is next to the Simmental cow, which of the following cannot be true:

(A) The Jersey cow is next to the Holstein.
(B) The Guernsey is next to the Ayrshire.
(C) The Ayrshire cow is in stall two.
(D) The Simmental cow is in stall four.
(E) The Holstein is in stall four.

Once the score came back, he had a cow.

My god I hate you. I'm never doing that again.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

I will opt that in.

Aimee had two cows, but they couldn't stand her neighbor's bagpipe playing, so they jumped over the Moon and never came back.

Chairman Meow has two cows. When they were deemed to be outstanding in their field, they started a website that sells software.

 

[GenMarshall]

I have no cows .

 

[Camikaze]

CivGeneral has four half-empty cows.

At least it's better than none.

 

[Askthepizzaguy]

Valka has two cows. They each had a litter of kittens.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Warpus has two cows. Together they account for about half a day's worth of his bacon consumption.

 

[Ayatollah So]

Birdjag's cows are Rhyme and Reason,
only one of which is pleasin',
the other's a little shriveled thing,
but that one cow, it sure can sing!

I hope it's OK to treat this as a Celebrity Roast sort of thing.
Oh, and of course, I'm fair game now.

 

[cardgame]

I think it is, as long as you don't go too far

askthepizzaguy had two cows. They made tldr posts for each other to read until they were both blind.

Spoiler :

I always read your posts ATPG

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Askthepizzaguy had two cows. They went over to Valka's farm because they wanted to play Canasta with Valka's cows. But they ran home again after Valka's kittens started asking, "I can has cheezburger?"

 

[Masada]

Cheezy has two cows, one is his politically appropriate wife and the other is his politically inappropriate mistress.

 

[downtown]

Jolly has 2 cows, and neither of them know how to run the football.

 

[bhsup]

Heretic Cata has two cows. Unfortunately one is an informant for the Securitate and has the other one under close surveillance.

 

[GoodGame]

I'm in.


VWRC has two cows, and none of them can comprehend the rules of this thread. And not just because they're cows, either!

Perf has two cows, one of them is on a treadmill powering a generator that powers a giant death robot that is feeding on the other cow.

Zelig has two cows...and they're tired of being used as free weights.

JR has two cows....one is suing the other for milkpractice.


Askthepizzaguy has two cows....both were cloned from the mammary gland of another cow.

Aimee had two cows, but neither one of them had ever been a prop in a Tom Petty music video, so she sold them both for concert tickets.

Dachs had two cows: one was heir to Theodora's personal cow, but the other cow did a historiographical analysis and found the basis of that claim to be weak.

A hypothetical creationist forum member had two cows: he though they both came from the same Ark, but he couldn't prove it.

Warpus had two cows: they thought they were safe holding "Eat Mor Pigs" signs, but hamburger goes well bacon in a meatlover's quiche (topped with fried onions of course).


In Lonewolf's country: The Cowletariat milks you (but not as bad as the Kaputitalist Pigs in the West)!

CFC once hosted cows in the NES, ruleset based on Masters of Orion of course.

 

[Birdjaguar]

I told you so's cows, Smart and Smarter,
Are among the best of methane farters:
Pull an udder and one lets go,
Pull another and the milk does flow;
From such pieces a world takes shape,
But it's never more than a man can make.

 

[GhostWriter16]

Birdjaguar had two cows. One was a bird, one was a jaguar. Which means neither one was a cow. Thus a contradiction. So life as we know it ended, because the law of possibility was destroyed.