Random Rants XIX: Failure Tactics

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I hate face-to-face interaction with total strangers.

Well once you got out and meet them they won't be total strangers. If you get a job with forced interaction (as most jobs would have), then you will be getting paid to make the people you around you fall into a category other than 'total stranger'.
 
It was very dark in my house. So I didn't see that the glass door that is normally open was closed. I walked into it, and it shattered. Luckily, I escaped with only a few minor cuts on my hand and a bruised nose. Shame though, seeing as it was stencilled glass that is apparently quite expensive to replace. It was pretty. :(
 
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!111111112222229000071329-43

:aargh:[pissed]
 
I've been considering suicide as a serious possibility the past few days. That's how much I want to avoid work. I've never worked a day in my life, and there's no job in the world that will please me. I'm fairly certain about that.

I just wanna sit at home and be on the internet all day. I hate face-to-face interaction with total strangers. It's always too awkward, and I can never come up with something to talk about.
What you have described sounds exactly like me before I had a job. I was on the computer all day, feeling down and worthless etc. I didn't get a job until I was almost 21 but it was a huge relief.

The internet is good but you don't want to stay on it all day. I am certain it will just compound the suicidal thoughts.



Do you have a job offered to you?

You may not find one that will please you (I don't really like mine), but a job will help you mature in other ways, including making it easier to talk to strangers. It might seem a bit intimidating but you'll get used to it and you'll get better after your first few days.

You'll forget about suicide and being on the internet all day, you'll have a sense of purpose, and eventually be rid of those thoughts.
 
I suggest applying to join the reserve forces in a non-combat role. The need to train yourself and the bettering-yourself mentality that it develops are really useful in normal life. You definitly won't be the only 'strange' person around and you might just get a new lease of life. Plus you don't get killed.
 
I've been considering suicide as a serious possibility the past few days. That's how much I want to avoid work. I've never worked a day in my life, and there's no job in the world that will please me. I'm fairly certain about that.

The problem is that people "love" me too much. I always hear how suicide is "selfish", but what about the people around me? Aren't they selfish for wanting to force me to live an unhappy life just so they don't feel bad? Bastards.

I keep hearing lame excuses as to how much I'll love working once I start, and how I'll meet people and get out of the house. I hate leaving the house. I just wanna sit at home and be on the internet all day. I hate face-to-face interaction with total strangers. It's always too awkward, and I can never come up with something to talk about.

*Sigh*

I hate my life.

:suicide:

Think of it this way if God exists then your going to hell as suicide is a cardinal sin.

If he doesn't then you have only this life or oblivion.

Personally I'm going to go out axe in hand but then I am a Viking.

Best to learn to appreciate it, it may well be the only chance you have to exist at all. Even the most suckiest experiences are transitory anyway. It gets better and easier the older you get too generally. And if I'm right then I'll stand you a few flagons in the Halls of Valhalla and we can sing great songs of our murderous escapades. I hear Valkyries are easy too...

And yes work sucks, get used to it.

If it didn't suck it wouldn't be called work it would be called, happy happy fun time or something like that.

Do you have Asperger's by any chance?
 
@PlutoniumEmpire

You might want to check this out. It has helped me in the past.

What you describe sounds like some sort of social frustration, and I think it's perfectly normal depending on the events in your life. What you have told us is a description of your current state; but possibly it sticks deeper than you might think, or you might know what is wrong. Humans are adaptive beings, and your situation is most probably an adaption performed to avoid uncomfortable situations or getting hurt.

As many others in here suggested, seeing a professional should be the best solution. You can also jump by www.psychcentral.org and check their forums out. They allow an outlet and you can test yourself a number of ways to determine your health online - and even though it might be misleading, those tests are better than nothing, and much better than suicide.

The factor that has you feel that way right now probably isn't you. There's a very small chance there's anything wrong with you. It is usually the environment you grew up in.

The people that tell you you should get a job have realized that you quite possibly need to get out of your house to begin feeling better; they're being as supportive as they can. Problem is, people that don't feel like you usually have a very difficult time actually knowing what they should tell you to have you feel better. That's what we have professionals for. They know what to do. People in general don't.

To sum it up: Check out the links and try to seek out a psychologist. The links provide help to find that as well. Some people can't handle talking with psychologists, but remember, they provide a service for you to help you out. They're medicine in the form of speech. :)
 
It's also winter assuming you don't live in the tropics or South of the Equator, isn't there some illness that is more common in winter? I know bi-polar/manic depression is or at least the depressive phase is and the manic phase is more common in summer If I remember correctly, and it's suggested sufferers have light sensitivity issues in their genes as well as a lithium deficiency and various other functional errors. Seasonal Affected Disorder I think the other thing is called.

If you feel isolated and don't want to leave the house you might be in hibernate mode. Sleep it off. :p
 
I suffer from at least Depression and ADHD (probably outgrew the "H" part). I forget my other diagnoses. For me, I get suicidal thoughts when I get really angry at life (adding to the usual feelings of hopelessness).

I did sleep it off and I feel a little better.

Thanks for the help, guys.
 
If you're going to turn to drugs I would advise you to use MDMA. Users frequently report having a more positive outlook on life in the long term. This phenomenon is also reported by people who have taken psilocybin mushrooms at any time in their life. Also, don't risk cannabis use if you've got a mental condition.

I'm talking about after the effects have worn off. You'll probably have a very positive outlook on life while on them.

Just sayin'...
 
If you're going to turn to drugs I would advise you to use MDMA. Users frequently report having a more positive outlook on life in the long term. This phenomenon is also reported by people who have taken psilocybin mushrooms at any time in their life. Also, don't risk cannabis use if you've got a mental condition.

I'm talking about after the effects have worn off. You'll probably have a very positive outlook on life while on them.

Just sayin'...

Jesus Christ, shekwan, don't suggest thast, for christ's sake.

MDMA has adverse effects on people who have a history of depression; they get none of euphoria, but still get the comedown, and spend three days in agony looking for a way out of life, and flinching at light.

Psylocibin is good, but again, if someone's in a vulnerable mental state and isn't very strong psychologically...STAY AWAY

However, I can only say good things about cannabis medically, especially with regards to ADHD. It's quite probable, from anecdotal evidence, that cannabis actually helps quite a lot in ADHD cases, when taken moderately.
 
Jesus Christ, shekwan, don't suggest thast, for christ's sake.

MDMA has adverse effects on people who have a history of depression; they get none of euphoria, but still get the comedown, and spend three days in agony looking for a way out of life, and flinching at light.

Psylocibin is good, but again, if someone's in a vulnerable mental state and isn't very strong psychologically...STAY AWAY

However, I can only say good things about cannabis medically, especially with regards to ADHD. It's quite probable, from anecdotal evidence, that cannabis actually helps quite a lot in ADHD cases, when taken moderately.

Really? I watched a documentary on MDMA that polled users who said that in the long term they were happier with life in general after using the drug. I'll try to find it after work.

Admittedly I didn't think too much about the effects of these drugs during use.

I was under the impression that one of the few negative effects of cannabis was that if you have a history of mental instability it could lead to problems with schizophrenia? Although the chances are still not all that high.
 
Really? I watched a documentary on MDMA that polled users who said that in the long term they were happier with life in general after using the drug. I'll try to find it after work.

Admittedly I didn't think too much about the effects of these drugs during use.

I was under the impression that one of the few negative effects of cannabis was that if you have a history of mental instability it could lead to problems with schizophrenia? Although the chances are still not all that high.

MDMA is fine for most people, for people with seratonin problems are people who you don't want to put anywhere enar MDMA.

Cannabis can lead to schitzophrenia, but IIRC, the general consensus now is if it's latent, and it's heavy prolonged cannabis use from a young age, where the brain is still developping.
It works grand for ADHD though.
 
MDMA is fine for most people, for people with seratonin problems are people who you don't want to put anywhere enar MDMA.

Cannabis can lead to schitzophrenia, but IIRC, the general consensus now is if it's latent, and it's heavy prolonged cannabis use from a young age, where the brain is still developping.
It works grand for ADHD though.

Ah ok. Thanks for setting me straight. :goodjob:
 
Ah ok. Thanks for setting me straight. :goodjob:

Bear in mind that a lof of this is
a)anecdotal, albeit on a somewhat large scale
b)not actually been tested rigidly scientifically, for evident reasons.

But MDMA actus upon seratonin receptors; those with depression are actually in deficit of seratonin, and wil mess it up.
 
If you're going to turn to drugs I would advise you to use MDMA. Users frequently report having a more positive outlook on life in the long term. This phenomenon is also reported by people who have taken psilocybin mushrooms at any time in their life. Also, don't risk cannabis use if you've got a mental condition.

I'm talking about after the effects have worn off. You'll probably have a very positive outlook on life while on them.

Just sayin'...

NIOO
From what ive seen mdma go from HORILBE REDEPRESSION to ecstatic state in a second. IR is basd for people feeling bad i hthink. At least not under somoene's supervision. its risky
/
 
I CAN"T FIND MY FAGS AND I"M DESPERATE FOR A SMOKE!!! How could I have lost them??? I HAD HALF A PACK LEFT!!! NOOOOO!!!! I'm so booorreeeeddda ARRRRRAAHHGGHHHHHHHH!!! I've torn my bags apart looking for them!!! GAHH!! I need to walk to the gas station now in the cold to buy a new one's and I lost my lighter as well!!!! AND ITS COLD AND NOW I'M ANNOYED!!! KILL ME NOW!!!!! GOD DAMN MY LIFE!!! DAMN IT TO HELL!!!
 
Well once you got out and meet them they won't be total strangers. If you get a job with forced interaction (as most jobs would have), then you will be getting paid to make the people you around you fall into a category other than 'total stranger'.

I'm not saying that the advice you're giving is bad, but it's certainly not as easy to execute as you're implying for many people with mental illness.

I suffer from at least Depression and ADHD (probably outgrew the "H" part). I forget my other diagnoses. For me, I get suicidal thoughts when I get really angry at life (adding to the usual feelings of hopelessness).

I did sleep it off and I feel a little better.

Thanks for the help, guys.

I assume you're regularly seeing a psychologist. I'm not going to pretend to be one, but attitude from my observation plays a big role in how well you do despite your limitations. I hope for your sake you are getting whatever help you need and are following their advice as best you can. Good luck
 
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