Roll To Dodge: Let's Run This Into The Ground

[Turquoiside]

I teach my penguins the art of bearback-riding and how to cooperate with the Dexter the polar bear.

 

[civplayah]

AAAH! The city's gonna die?

I escape.

 

[KaiserElectric]

Updae in a few hours, hurry up and post.

 

[Abaddon]

You didn't reply to my bloody wall post!

I steal Cath's lucky clover

 

[landlubber]

I escape the burning house.

 

[Reiser]

Oh cool, I wasted my horseshoe but it helped a lot.

Call in a SWAT team to help destroy these criminals.

 

[Darth Caesar]

It's been a few hours please update.

 

[KaiserElectric]

I rub butter on my hair.

(2) The Cloud of Ick right next to you loves butter, and smothers you in Ick. You will lose 1 to 10 hp per turn until you leave the cloud.

I escape.

(18) You escape to the Glorious Soviet Union and meet the incomming Red Army. One of the soldiers says, "Commissar Civplayah! Are you hear to help us destroy the capitalists pigs in Generic City?"

Congratulations, you've been promoted (apparently).

Call in a SWAT team to help destroy these criminals.

(17) "Hold on officer, we're on the way!" SWAT team due next turn.

I look for another Golden Horseshoe.

(15) You find a regular horseshoe. This functions similarly to the four-leaf clover.

I steal Cath's lucky clover

(20) You kick Catharsis in the nads and take your clover back. You relish in the vengeance!

I escape the burning house.

(5) You trip on a burning Ottoman. Your face smacks on the ground for 5 damage.

I thaw myself out by setting the room on fire again.

(3) The room is already on fire, so you just burn your fingers for 6 damage.

I teach my penguins the art of bearback-riding and how to cooperate with the Dexter the polar bear.

(19) You now have a fearsome bear-cavalry penguin on your side. Another penguin hears of your glory and brings his own bear mount to your cause.

I grab the conscripts bullets and delever a single shot to his head.

(10) He swings an empty Vodka bottle at you. It misses comepletely, but you still back off.

I acquire a gas mask to save myself from the gas.

(13) You find a gas mask sufficient enough to save you from the radioactivity. It will keep you un-radioactive for 2 turns, unless you replace the filter.

Painis Cupcake yells, "I WILL EAT YOU," and jumps at DarthCaesar.
ROLL TO DODGE
(20) DarthCaesar has 1337 skills, and dodges Painis and sprays three bullets at him for 30 damage.

The Cloud of Ick sticks around Mango Elephant.

The Red Army is due in 2 turns.

Radioactivity in 2 turns.

 

[Mango Elephant]

I dance in the icky cloud.

 

[Darth Caesar]

I shoot Painis until it is dead.

 

[landlubber]

I put out the fire.

 

[DroopyTofu]

I go hide from the SWAT team in a super-secret, high-tech safehouse.

 

[Abaddon]

I plant my clover, hoping it will grow into a 100% lucky +1 clover.

 

[Catharsis]

I set myself on fire.

 

[KaiserElectric]

I won't be able to update today, so the update will come tommorow. Therefore, I hope you will all send in an order.

 

[civplayah]

I'll be playing as unflirt for now (so I don't... socialize with the guards).

I continue psychoanalysis, waiting until the city blows up.

 

[Reiser]

Find a gas mask to save myself from radiation...if that's how it works...

 

[Turquoiside]

I flee with my minions to Nameless Town.

 

[KaiserElectric]

I dance in the icky cloud.

(1) The Cloud of Ick is not at all impressed, and it becomes incredibly icky in a short amount of time. The scent is so powerful that you are knocked out.

You also take 9 damage for being Icked.

I continue psychoanalysis, waiting until the city blows up.

(17) Driven by your new position of Commissar, you unlock the personality Red. When you are Red, you can order the Red Army to attack someone for you.

Find a gas mask to save myself from radiation...if that's how it works...

(2) You attempt to steal a gas mask, but the one you try to take is attached to someone's face, and he/she isn't at all pleased.
ROLL TO DODGE
(8) HUDDAH-HUDDAH-HUH! You were axed for 5 damage.

No orders!

But I gave extra time!

I plant my clover, hoping it will grow into a 100% lucky +1 clover.

(20) Your clover blooms into a golden clover. The golden clover will now have a 50% chance to reroll a roll of 10 or less. The clover will not be consumed, but it can be destroyed or taken by other players.

I put out the fire.

(10) You can't find a fire extinguisher.

I set myself on fire.

Your balls hurt to much to think about starting a flame.

I flee with my minions to Nameless Town.

(14) You flee to Nameless town. You will be safe from the radioactivity here.

I shoot Painis until it is dead.

(12) BANG BANG BANG (40 hp damage)

I go hide from the SWAT team in a super-secret, high-tech safehouse.

(12) You find an airtight safe room under the gun store, and quickly jump in.

A SWAT team descends through the roof of the gun store to assist officer Reiser.

The Cloud of Ick sticks around Mango Elephant.

The Red Army is on the outskirts of town!

The Radioactive Dispenser is ready to deploy next turn!

Painis looks very, very mad.

Pyro has joined the game!

 

[civplayah]

Switch to Red.

I'll wait for the army to arrive.