Would you call the cops on your kid?

[Ziggy Stardust]

Nope. I'd deal with it myself.

 

[Tank_Guy#3]

It really depends on the crime. If they stole a lot of money, if they mugged somebody: call the police. Vandalism, major theft, underage drinking (at a party I'd call the cops. Alone or with one or two friends, send the friend home, then the punishment of drinking a lot more for being caught drinking), or anything major like that, I'd call the police.

Even if only to put a lot of fear into them, so they don't do it again.

 

[silver 2039]

No never....

 

[MobBoss]

I disagree. Calling the cops on the kid for stealing $1,000 in cash is just silly and the wrong thing to do. Why waste the police department's time (and taxpayer's money) punishing your child for a petty crime that a parent can punish the child themselves?

I dont see stealing such a large sum of money as a petty crime.

And I dont see my recommendation as 'silly' at all. Whats silly is that someone who has never raised a kid, or even dreamed of being able to have a kid, calling my opinion silly....

Thats whats silly....

 

[RedRalph]

I dont see stealing such a large sum of money as a petty crime.

And I dont see my recommendation as 'silly' at all. Whats silly is that someone who has never raised a kid, or even dreamed of being able to have a kid, calling my opinion silly....

Thats whats silly....

you having a kid dosent make your opinion any less silly than anyone elses. I have a kid, so is my opinion automatically more valid than anyone who dosent?

 

[classical_hero]

I guess at some point, if you have failed as a parent to a big extent, you might as well see if law enforcement can do a better job.

That is not always true. You can be the best parents and your child can still be a rotten, it just depends on the child.

 

[Traitorfish]

Yep. Everyone is responsible for their actions and should be made to face the consequences. Simply being a relative of my mine doesn't make them an exception.

 

[IglooDame]

A married couple with which I am friends with is experiencing this exact problem - their 15yo girl is prone to very violent outbursts to the point of attempting to hurt her mother. It's a truly miserable situation.

My wife once called the police on her daughter when the daughter (14ish at the time) and a friend took her car out joyriding.

Gray area? Absolutely. I think if the behavior directly impacted non-family members, or the situation required police resources to help end it safely, I'd probably call them. Stealing money from me doesn't rise to that level, though, and I can think of a few corrective avenues to take that wouldn't involve law enforcement.

 

[aelf]

I pity parents with yob kids like that, but then again why did their kids turn out that way? Yobs deserve the treatment they give to others. Maybe have them beat up their own parents to pulp and then being tasered and beaten to pulp themselves might be a suitable punishment.

Is the world so hopeless now that you can't stop young people from becoming brainless hooligans?

 

[MobBoss]

you having a kid dosent make your opinion any less silly than anyone elses.

It makes it more informed. No more, no less.

I have a kid, so is my opinion automatically more valid than anyone who dosent?

Pretty much. You have experience and insight that others without kids dont have.

That is not always true. You can be the best parents and your child can still be a rotten, it just depends on the child.

I would say it how a kid turns out has more to do with the parents than any other factor.

 

[MadScotsMan]

If they stole $1000 from me, I would know, because that much money doesn't just dissappear, and would make him/her/it pay me back all of it. If he was caught smoking weed in the woods, I wouldn't care much, same with drinking. If they are drinking and driving or smoking and driving. If they stole from any body else, like a friend or something, I would pay them back and then make my kid pay me back.

 

[Mise]

Pretty much. You have experience and insight that others without kids dont have.

So even opinions of the worst parent on the planet are more valid than mine?

I mean, imagine the worst parent you can possibly think of. The kind of parent that buys their ten-year-old son cigarette, and allows him to beat up the pet dog. Their "experience and insight" makes their opinions more valid than mine?

Alright......

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

I am not sure he is saying that. But all else being equal actually having children gives one extra perspective.

 

[MobBoss]

So even opinions of the worst parent on the planet are more valid than mine?

Sure. Consider such advice as 'lessons learned'.

I mean, imagine the worst parent you can possibly think of. The kind of parent that buys their ten-year-old son cigarette, and allows him to beat up the pet dog. Their "experience and insight" makes their opinions more valid than mine?

Alright......

Of course. Especially after they did it and they see first hand how bad their choices were and their effect. They would certainly be more informed than you on what the bad choices do and how they effect a kid....and maybe, just maybe, they might have some information on how they could have done things better. Wisdom is also gained from learning from your mistakes right?

 

[Birdjaguar]

I would say it how a kid turns out has more to do with the parents than any other factor.

I would disagree. Parents are influential until puberty, then usually peers take over. But far more influnetial are genetics. I believe that personality is mostly hardwired in the DNA. I think that the best role of the parents is to guide a child into how to be 'successful' given the personality and talents (or lack of) that they have.

I pity parents with yob kids like that, but then again why did their kids turn out that way? Yobs deserve the treatment they give to others. Maybe have them beat up their own parents to pulp and then being tasered and beaten to pulp themselves might be a suitable punishment.

Mostly genes. But bad parenting, abusive environments and neglect can exascerbate bad qualities and make them worse.

 

[D'Artagnan59]

Depends on the crime.

Speeding, no. Something like shoplifting? Yes.

 

[MobBoss]

I would disagree. Parents are influential until puberty, then usually peers take over.

A parents influence is even more important at that period. Maintaining healthy rules and borders, while allowing a teen to mature and develop takes a lot of parents time and dedication. And its important to kids to see that their parents are really interested in them and what they are doing. Kids with parents that truly involve themselves in their kids lives do a lot better in life, developmentally and in their social interaction/behavior.

Mostly genes. But bad parenting, abusive environments and neglect can exascerbate bad qualities and make them worse.

I dont buy into the assumption that kids are doomed to be bad because of genetics.

 

[RedRalph]

Sure. Consider such advice as 'lessons learned'.



Of course. Especially after they did it and they see first hand how bad their choices were and their effect. They would certainly be more informed than you on what the bad choices do and how they effect a kid....and maybe, just maybe, they might have some information on how they could have done things better. Wisdom is also gained from learning from your mistakes right?

MobBoss even for you this is beyond a joke... someone who has convictions for child abuse as a parent has more valid opinions on parenthood than anybody who dosent have a kid? Are you serious?

 

[Ziggy Stardust]

Wisdom is gained from learning from your mistakes, not simply from making them. Those who make mistakes hardly ever learn from them. One of the reasons why history has a tendency to repeat itself.

Mise talked about the worst parent on the planet. I don't think the worst parent on the planet falls into the learning from mistakes category.

 

[JohnRM]

If your kid broke a law, would you get law enforcement involved? I'm sure just about everyone would if their kid murdered someone

It would depend on the situation. A cold-blooded murder for the sake of murder itself, sure. But, I could envision situations where I would not.

, or robbed a liquor store or something.

I honestly can't see myself raising my children so terribly that they would do something like this, that they would feel as though their situation was so desperate.

What if your kid stole money from you? What if your kid stole from another (extended) family member, or a family friend? What if your kid were smoking pot in the woods? What if your kid took your car without permission?

The only point at which I would notify law enforcement would be if I thought my child were in extraordinary danger, even if they were their own danger.