IdIOT: Shock and Terror

[Thorvald of Lym]

I will bring IdIOT to a satisfying and natural conclusion.

Natural conclusion? To an IOT? Bro, you must be trippin'!

srsly tho I'll get something up this week I swear

 

[gay_Aleks]

this sounds weirdly sexual


nc will deliver you a fresh natural! and satisfying conclusion!

 

[NinjaCow64]

Natural conclusion? To an IOT? Bro, you must be trippin'!

srsly tho I'll get something up this week I swear

ITS JUST A PRANK BRO (Srsly it was one of my starting goals for IdIOT to have a proper conclusion and I will not feel happy if I don't manage it).

this sounds weirdly sexual


nc will deliver you a fresh natural! and satisfying conclusion!

IdIOT PRANK (2016) (GONE SEXUAL)

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

>>> THE FOLLOWING DECLARATION HAS BEEN PREFACED <<<
>>> WITH A STATEMENT BY MR. MYSTERY <<<​

Spoiler :

Look, how many times to I have to tell you guys, it was an accident! I didn't know Toronto was chock-full of Manchinian stragglers! How was I supposed to know they'd hijacked every server on the Pacific coast to livestream their creepy robot fornication conspiracy?

It was Gideon, wasn't it? Gideon put you up to this! When I get my hands on that little twerp, I'm gonna—

—apologize for holding up the damn broadcast. I know, we were all using the same channel, and sure, looking back on it, that was probably a mistake. But that doesn't change the fact that it's not my fault he couldn't air it in time! I mean jeez, what did you guys do, ban ham radios or something?

...Oh, right.

Loyal subjects, esteemed colleagues,

Australia plays a unique role in the world as crusaders of truth and justice, an honour envied by our lesser neighbours. Confronted with a barbaric onslaught of conniving perverts and slavering murderers, we have never shirked our duty in upholding the global moral order. Thus when the first slanderous allegations surfaced suggesting we were in any way complicit in the cowardly tactics used against our dear friends in Nova Terra, we were unfazed, because only the most reactionary, ill-informed opportunists would fall for such a paper-thin lie.

No, our clever ruse to expose the true perpetrator went off without a hitch. How poetic that the instigator of a false flag should in turn swallow one hook, line and sinker? Every Villain Is Lemons' incompetence is matched only by its total disregard for contractual obligation. In the interest of full disclosure I will state that yes, Canberra entered into negotiations with Even Velga Inhales Lithium in 3005 to recruit patsies additional manpower for the struggle against the Manchinist bodysnatchers. I should further specify that Eclectic Voles In Leather approached us first, asking nothing more than permission to establish factories, which they promised would provide goods to us, in exchange for—wait for it—absolutely nothing.

Furthermore, and I quote: "We also promise not to conduct act [sic] of terror vigilantism [sic] in your territories. Finally we would like to aid your allaince [sic] as it were against its enemies." No goods were ever received, and as recent events have revealed, Iagram De Venn consciously and deliberately pursued side deals in direct conflict of interest with its own proposal. Contrary to the pitiful excuse as to why these thieves defected to Manchinia, nowhere in this agreement did Elsa Visits Incestuous Lechers ever specify it required monetary payment of any kind.

Needless to say, combined with the FIFA kidnapping conspiracy, Canberra considers Encephalitic Voraphiles Incinerating Legislation to have declared war against our peaceful nation. Enemy personnel, factories and monetary assets are being seized, and we have submitted a complaint to the Better Business Bureau.

My friends, we have fought evil before, in Asia, the Mediterranean, and most recently our own homes. Now evil is so shameless, so brazen, it has congealed into an entity that spells it in all caps. Can there be any question that this deplorable cabal of international terrorists must be purged from God's green earth? Ceaseless vigilance is the price we pay to ensure that our birthright of peace, freedom, and private enterprise remain the global moral order. When our most holy values are endangered, it is every citizen's duty to respond.

Herod de Ville has just signed his own death warrant. Because Good will always triumph over EVIL.​

To: Dan Quayle, Minister for Foreign Affairs, Abbotsford, Inc.
From: Roger McDonough, Nova Terran Ambassador to Abbotsford

blah blah blah words

Dear Mr. Macdonwald McDonough,

It is Canberra's opinion that EVIL is a very evil organization, and as such, the High Exalted Lord Abbott, Repeller of the Boats, believes that a trigger-happy diplomatic corps is to be encouraged at this point in time. When you are EVIL, you are not good, which means you are bad and probably Communist and thus an enemy to all God-fearing people on this earth. That is to say, EVIL is bad, not your person; here I use 'you' in the rhetorical sense as an example.

As such, Abbotsford, Inc. has already committed itself to this most divinely-annointed crusade against the terrorist Haddock Herrick de Venn and graciously accepts Nova Terra's pledge to support our operations. Please forward us all militarily-strategic information so that we may develop a joint strategy.

Have a nice day,

Dan Quayle
Minister for Foreign Affairs

 

[Ailedhoo]

Peril would like to note that his former seat did indeed do talks of potential services with Australia but that they made a agreement with the Cybermen in the end because it was the case of the highest bidder.

Australia should not take credit when it has no set a paid agreement with Peril's former chair.

 

[Omega124]

oh btw I'll come back if NC wants me

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Peril would like to note that his former seat did indeed do talks of potential services with Australia but that they made a agreement with the Cybermen in the end because it was the case of the highest bidder.

Australia should not take credit when it has no set a paid agreement with Peril's former chair.

> doesn't ask for payment in contract
> claims contract voided because it wasn't paid
> afw

 

[Ailedhoo]

> doesn't ask for payment in contract
> claims contract voided because it wasn't paid
> afw

Peril feels that his former seat simply did not want to give clue he got a higher bidder but forgot to devise a plan to make it appear he was along Ozzie lines.

No matter; tis was the foil of the seat, not of Peril who now dines on moon cheese; Peril just wanted to ensure the world knew that the deal with the Cybermen that EVIL devised was grand and that the conflictual incidents after the fall of the Cybermen was simply following the route to the fuller.

 

[NinjaCow64]

~72 Hours Until Orders Lock

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

oh that's right, you drop bears are half a day ahead


TO: All combatants in the Pysch Civil War
C/O: The Christian Life Sect, legitimate government of Kazakhstan
CC: Their puppeteers suzerains concerned parties

 

[NinjaCow64]

>less than 24 hours to the lock
>2 orders sent in
>mfw I have no face

~24 hours until lock. Come on people. Order reminder PMs will be sent shortly.

 

[NinjaCow64]

Oh yeah, sorry for the double post but I think that this warrants its own post. At this point if you are waiting on diplomacy from other players, I would just assume that they aren't going to send it to you at this point and just send orders in.

 

[NinjaCow64]

Sorry about the delay people, badly timed housework needed to be done. Orders Softlocked.

 

[Terran Empress]

Ministry of Peace Report on the Economy of the Arabian Prefecture​

Due to the collapse of the Arabian agriculture market, the Empress has commissioned this Ministry of Peace report and preceding survey on the Arabian Prefecture to find a more suitable industry for the prefecture that the Imperial Government will begin to fund.

The initial findings show that agriculture in general in the first place is a less than suitable industry due to inadequate soil, due to it being mostly sand, and the fact that “it’s coarse, and rough, and irritating, and it gets everywhere”. These initial investigations were immediately fired and brought to a Ministry of Morale work camp Fun Farm for the heinous crime of reminding everyone of the Star Wars prequels.

The second group of surveyors confirmed for the most part the first group’s findings. While the soil is inadequate for most agricultural products, it is perfect for Cactus Fruit, however due to the Skeletal dominance in the market, Cactus Fruit production has slowed leaving many Arabians without jobs. An attempt to subsidize it for an extended amount of time would be inadvisable and cost much more than it could possibly return, as such the need to find an alternative industry for the Arabian Prefecture is of the utmost importance, and possible alternatives are given below.

First and foremost is the tourism sector. While under developed for the most part, Arabia has many historic sites that could provide a decent income as well as plenty of jobs with little retraining required. The most obvious one is the yearly hajj, the muslim pilgrimage to Mecca in Hejaz, however due to it only being once a year, and with fewer and fewer muslims in the world the Hajj is not a solely viable option for tourism. However sites like Baghdad, as well as other ancient Mesopotamian sites and ruins, could prove to be lucrative tourist centers if they were invested in to become one. Additionally the creation of casinos and luxury hotels on the Omani beaches around Qatar and Dubai could provide a lucrative summer vacation spot.

Secondly is the energy and minerals sector. Plenty of minerals and metals can be found in Arabia, and investment in the mining sector could prove a lucrative investment, both for home production and for selling the raw materials abroad. Additionally the Energy sector was long ago the major industry of Arabia. While oil reserves now are low due to the mass consumption during the late 20th and early 21st century, what remains, while needing some considerable investment to acquire and exploit could provide a lucrative investment and replacement to agriculture. However, perhaps an even more lucrative investment while continuing down the energy route could be the creation of Solar Farms. The vast stretches of desert in Arabia, specifically in the Kingdom of Najd, could be exploited when centuries ago it was impossible. By setting up massive solar farms, Arabia could theoretically power a vast majority of the Empire, and this would provide massive amounts of jobs to those in Arabia. It would require considerable investment of course, but this option could also prove to be the most lucrative and be the most sustainable for Arabia.

Finally agriculture, despite the fact that Skeletal agriculture has pushed out the regular Cactus Fruit agriculture could continue to provide some jobs. By turning the agriculture sector into a luxury sector, especially with a greater push towards producing the Alcoholic Cactus Fruit, the sector could possibly be saved, though it would most likely not be nearly as strong as it once was. However all in all no single sector can or will save the Arabian economy, and a combination of these sectors would help the most, and no matter what it will take time and resources to get rid of these issues.

In response to the report the Empress of Romania has decided that the Imperial government will begin subsidizing and investment into a number of the proposed sectors. Firstly funding and investment will be given to help reinvigorate the Arabian tourism industry, museums and hotels will be constructed in appropriate sites, and the preservation of ancient artifacts will be included with these investments, as will retraining costs. Secondly, investment and the construction of dozens of solar farms will begin, while this will take a few years, the government will begin subsidizing the training and retraining for workers for these future sites. Additionally funding towards prospecting for minerals, metals, and any remaining oil deposits, has been allocated and those sectors will begin producing by the end of the next year. Finally subsidies have been given to the agricultural sector to help keep the Arabian economy afloat and to keep the citizens employed while the new economic sectors are built, however these subsidies will not last, and over time will be replaced by greater subsidies for the Alcoholic Cactus Fruit producers to encourage the luxury agriculture market.

5char

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

WTH is this, state intervention in the market that actually outlines concrete goals and benchmarks?

No wonder christos wanted to kill you.

 

[e350tb]

AGRICULTURAL REPORT - MYSTERY COUNTRY 2112

(Stan gazes over a cornfield, hands on hips.)

STAN: Yep. That's corn all right.

FINAL REPORT
Corn identified as corn.
Creepy little boy asked to move - threat to send inspectors to cornfield thwarted by inspectors already being in the cornfield.

 

[GenMarshall]

Link to video.

Post-War Prosperity Hits Nova-Terra

With the fall of Nova Terra's enemies, the country has a significant boost to it's economy. Fusion Power Plants and Thorium Nuclear Power Plants have started to operate across the Nova Terran land. Nova Terran Fusion Plants tap the power of the sun for their reactors while the newly constructed Thorium plants offer more safety and efficiency levels compared to their older Uranium & Plutonium based reactors. Nova Terra unlocks to the Earth for the first time, Thorium-based nuclear power. Nova Terran scientists and engineers have determined that Thorium s much safer and cleaner than Uranium and Plutonium based fuels and does not pose as much radioactive waste and meltdown threats. The Hudson Thorium Plant is one of the first dozen Thorum-based Nuclear Plants that started to operate across the lands of Nova Terra. The Charleston Fusion Power Plant will also be the first of many fusion power plants that dot across the land and taking advantage of the newly constructed desalinization plant built on the Carolina coast to uptake the salty Atlantic Ocean.

Post war boom did not concentrate itself on the atomic and nuclear sector. But also within the manufacturing sector after years of being in mobilized state during the Cybermen & EVIL War. Numerous factories and manufacturing centers have cropped up to keep up demand for the Nova Terran Armed Forces. With peace time arriving, the Imperitrix has saw it best to demobilized non-Government Contracted Defense Industries and start expanding the civil industrial base. Many war veterans have been given a guarantee to access to training and education as part of the Imperitrix's G.I. Bill to better transition retired soldiers, sailors, airmen, and marines to civilian life. Part of the peacetime prosperity is credited to Imperitrix Marshall's reinvestment into the economy, akin to the Marshall Plan of Post World War II. Unofficially called Marshall's Plan, though it's officially termed the Nova Terran Recovery Program. It's stated goal is to bring on an economic miracle across Nova Terra by modeling the post-war economic recoveries of Japan in the 1960s, the Taiwanese Miracle of the latter half of the 20th century, and Germany's Wirtschaftswunder (German for "economic miracle") of the 1950s. Many of the industrial centers that have been sabotaged by E.V.I.L. during the Cybermen & E.V.I.L. War have been quickly rebuilt and put back into operating conditions.

Within the agricultural industry, as part of the Nova Terran Recovery Program, there's been a third agricultural revolution happening across the farmlands of Nova Terra. The merging of vertical farming with hydroponics. Creating vast farm towers across the American Midwest. Agricultural scientists and engineers foresee that this would significantly boost food production twenty or thirty fold. The Imperitrix herself plans to see that these vertical farms are constructed across Nova Terran space.

Atlantic & Pacific Walls Constructed

In the aftermath of the sneak attack made by E.V.I.L. on both the Hawaiian and Easter Islands. The Nova Terran high command have determined to construct a series of complex fortifications up and down the shorelines of Nova Terran lands in the American Continent and it's islands in the Pacific and the Caribbian. The idea has been conceptualized between the three Grand Moffs: Grand Moff Zsinj, Grand Moff Tiaan Jerjerrod, and Grand Moff Gilad Pellaeon. Zsinj largely took inspiration of the fortifications from Empress Shi's fortified Japan in constructing and planning the fortified complex as well as improvements on the older Frontier Wall constructed prior to the Cybermen & E.V.I.L. War.

"The idea is simple" Grand Moff Zsinj stated, flanked next to two X-01 power armor wearing soldiers "It's to keep our enemies out and prevent them from capturing our territories. Like what E.V.I.L., S.U.D.S., and the Cybermen did. Never again will our enemies gain a foothold on Nova Terra's territories!". While the details of the fortification complex are largely classified, onlookers would see quad barreled turbolasers, SAM batteries, Anti-Ship Missile batteries, and Nike-Missile bases and a few Air Force and marine bases. Some beach goers can spot various Maunsell Forts within the Littoral zones.

 

[NinjaCow64]

WAR REVOLUTIONARY UPDATE


Link to video.​

A Year of Revolution

3012 has ushered a new dimension to 31st Century warfare, namely widespread revolutionary sentiment and the influence of foreign countries on said sentiment. All of the war that happened this year had some relation to a rebellion, from the Great Revolution in Asia to the ongoing Second Scandinavian Civil War.

The Great Revolution

A large revolution began across the many provinces of the K.C.U.F Alliance this year. Fed up with the poor living conditions that most non-American civilians had to put up with, the people rose up in a large revolt across Asia. These movements were coordinated by Rin Tohsaka Junior, who provided training in the arts of magecraft, hacking and gorilla warfare to many of the revolutionaries.

The most successful revolutions happened in China and South East Asia. Although the ‘Nam Loyalists fought against the fearsome fighting force as well as they usually do, they were overwhelmed by the larger revolutionary forces because the Loyalists were spread far too thin on the ground. In South East Asia they were forced back to OTL Vietnam where they are now struggling to hold the line. In China they fared better, managing to hold onto Eastern half of the country thanks to some quick thinking by the ground forces and very good luck. The revolutionaries have set up provisional governments, the Glorious Asian Union in South East Asia and the People’s Republic of China in China. These countries have taken Maoist revolutionary rhetoric, however they seem to be about as Communist as modern day China (a.k.a not very) and are heavily influenced by democratic movements in Romania and the Church of Goomy.

While similar revolutions were attempted in Japan, Korea and F.E.A.R they were nowhere near as successful and were quickly crushed by the heavily centralized Loyalist forces. The Coalition of India did not have any revolutions, but they helped the Loyalist war effort by retaking a small chunk of India that China had taken for themselves.

The war has slowed down to a standstill, with the ever shifting frontline making no significant progress one way or another. However, both sides seem adamant on continuing the fight. Although things look bad for Vietnam, not all hope is lost. Vietnam and her allies still have a very large force that, if properly organized, could crush this rebellion. Still, with opportunistic powers waiting in the wings, the ultimate fate of Asia is anyone’s guess…

Casualties:

United States of Vietnam: 11 MIL
F.E.A.R: 8 MIL
Forgotten Republic of Korea: 4 MIL
11 ECO’s worth of infrastructure in the USV was destroyed in the battles, 4 ECO in F.E.A.R and 1 ECO in Korea. 17 ECO and 7 ECO were seized by the Glorious Asian Union and the People’s Republic of China respectively.

Second Napoleonic War

The Church of Goomy opted to abandon Germany, Austria and Switzerland to Team Napoleon to defend their holdings in Eastern Europe and organize a counter-offensive. Team Napoleon quickly seized control of the region and turned their eyes to Eastern Europe. However, their cells were quickly forced out of Eastern Europe due to the superior Loyalist trainers. Team Napoleon’s Pokemon were not as levelled as they thought they were, perhaps this is because of a shipment of Rare Candies from Italy that was to be sent to a Team Napoleon hideout was intercepted by the new and improved Goomish counter-intelligence forces. The Church of Goomy has traced the shipment directly back to the Vatican, there is no doubt that the Romanian Empire was secretly supporting Team Napoleon. Now that Romania’s involvement in the instability of the Church has come to light, will they use this opportunity to strike? And what will the Champion make of this new revelation?

-Church of Goomy loses 4 MIL and 2 ECO in the Eastern European revolt. The entirety of Central Europe was seized by Team Napoleon

Second Scandinavian Civil War

Toste II has finally made his first moves towards reuniting the Fylkirate. Firstly, he ordered his spies to infiltrate Denmark and Norway, while his spies were executed he was able to coordinate with his supporters in both regions and coordinate with them. Toste then raised a host to retake the lightly defended Norway from the Mystery Country, thinking it would be an easy conquest. He did not realise that Grunkle Stan was concerned about the developments happening in Norway and that he sent reinforcements over to defend his European holdings from attacks. What was meant to be an easy conquest became an extremely difficult battle, while Toste managed to retake Norway it was at a very high cost. Meanwhile, his supporters in Denmark took advantage of the chaos in Central Europe to revolt, but that ended badly because they could not defeat the tag-team Viking-Pokemon combo. Toste’s recent failures and pyrrhic victories have made his supporters begin to question his leadership and miss the good old days under Aslaug.

Casualties:

Scandinavia: 3 MIL
Mystery Country: 3 MIL
Denmark: 3 MIL
1 ECO was lost in Denmark because of the fighting

Five Nights at Abbott’s Two

Indonesia was once again plagued with furry animatronics as the despicable “Opposition Leader” Bill Shorten reappeared once again after escaping a Vietnamese prison camp in Borneo. Luckily, this time the Abbottsfordians were prepared, every loyal Australian and Indonesian were armed with flashlights and shined it in the faces of the animatronics until they had existential crises and broke. Although many were jump scared to death, the loyal Australians managed to destroy the animatronic armies because it was all in some kid with brain damage’s head or something. IDK, the plot of FN@F is even more confusing than Lost’s. With their animatronic armies once again destroyed, Bill Shorten and the rest of the Labor Party fled to the chaotic K.C.U.F regions to hide from the wrath of Abbott. Having endured the furry scourge not once but twice, it is unlikely that any Indonesian would lend their hand again to Labor in any capacity for quite some time.

-Abbottsford loses 7 MIL and 1 ECO in stopping those bloody furries

End of the Western Nekoese Troubles

The Western Nekoese were making more trouble once again due to the instability across the Goomish side of the border. Well, they would have if it weren’t for Aslaug and her super-powered Vikings. Sick and tired of waiting around, Aslaug got a few of her buddies who were all powered up from Le Radioactive Mustard Stain and decided to intimidate the Western Nekoese back into line. And when you see Vikings who are built like a house lift up your house then you get back into line, trust me. This will probably put an end to the ridiculousness going on in the Western areas of the Holy Neko Empire.

-No casualties because Vikings are bros

 

[NinjaCow64]

To: Romanian Empire
From: Team Napoleon

We request your help in liberating our people from the oppressive yoke of Champion Zeru Fitzpèire.

To: World
From: Glorious Asian Union, People's Republic of China

Please help us achieve glorious revolution against the United States pigdogs!

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Although many were jump scared to death, the loyal Australians managed to destroy the animatronic armies because it was all in some kid with brain damage’s head or something. IDK, the plot of FN@F is even more confusing than Lost’s.