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Roll to Dodge: Kill or be Killed.

Discussion in 'Forum Games' started by kill fire, Sep 23, 2013.

  1. choxorn

    choxorn Watermelon Headcrab

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2006
    Messages:
    18,023
    Location:
    Honolulu
    Wow, mythmonster's flying mount is awesome! I wish I could fly.

    I wave one of my swords around in circles and attmept to fly like a helicopter.
     
  2. west india man

    west india man Immortal

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2008
    Messages:
    9,119
    Location:
    Brazil
    I ride around the neighbourhood in my awesome motorbike. :cool:
     
  3. Tsoate

    Tsoate Prince

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2013
    Messages:
    538
    Location:
    The Shadows of your Soul
    I charismatically eat my clover, so its luck affects ~ALL~ my rolls!
     
  4. Marcher Jovian

    Marcher Jovian Prince

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2013
    Messages:
    425
    I find a 50$ bill on the ground and use it to pay off my debt.
     
  5. talonschild

    talonschild Drive-By NESer

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2011
    Messages:
    1,946
    Location:
    Vancouver, BC, Canada
    I throw my newfound possessions at a passing motorcyclist, knocking him off and stealing his motorcycle.
     
  6. SamSniped

    SamSniped DJ Goodboye

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2011
    Messages:
    5,413
    Location:
    playing some funky jams
    lurker's comment: I don't materialize into this world, then :p
     
  7. mythmonster2

    mythmonster2 BEC NOIR! RUN!

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2005
    Messages:
    2,873
    Location:
    Houston TX, Yeeeehaw!
    Interested at the band of pirates, I go down to check out what's going on with them.
     
  8. KaiserElectric

    KaiserElectric Total Freakin Besties

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2007
    Messages:
    3,454
    I put on my jeans and find a car to drive around in.
     
  9. Omega124

    Omega124 Challenging Fate

    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2008
    Messages:
    7,038
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Albany, New York
    I punch the unfinished potato gun into a finished state
     
  10. kill fire

    kill fire Enormous Midget

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    775
    Location:
    The cold, dark dungeons of Dredmor
    Sorry the update is a bit late today.

    12: You do a kinda spinny-swirly thing with your sword. It doesn't make you fly, and you nearly hurt yourself doing it.

    14: You are the envy of passersby all around the block.

    5(6): You attempt to swallow your clover. It tastes terrible, and you nearly choke. You immediately spit it back out. (-2hp)

    16: You find $50 on the ground and hand it to your bookie. Unfortunately, as your debt doubled this turn, you still owe $30. The bookie offers to drop your debt entirely, however, if you can beat him in a hand of poker.

    18: A biker approaches, and once in rage, you throw your cheeseburger at his helmet. He falls off, and you take the motorcycle for yourself. The biker looks none too happy. As you mount up and prepare to make your escape, west india man flies by on his stylish red bike.

    11: You land a short distance away from the pirates, just in time to see their four-armed captain awkwardly twirling a sword around.

    15: You have covered your shame. You walk outside to your driveway and find a beat up old car there, with the keys in the ignition.

    17(19): With your mighty cyborg strength, you relentlessly beat the potato gun until it yields into a functional weapon.


    The strange man stops poking around and begins leaving the neighborhood.
     
  11. talonschild

    talonschild Drive-By NESer

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2011
    Messages:
    1,946
    Location:
    Vancouver, BC, Canada
    I follow west india man, on the basis that anyone who looks that cool clearly knows where he's going.
     
  12. Omega124

    Omega124 Challenging Fate

    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2008
    Messages:
    7,038
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Albany, New York
    I use the potato gun to give myself a nice meal of mashed potatos.
     
  13. mythmonster2

    mythmonster2 BEC NOIR! RUN!

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2005
    Messages:
    2,873
    Location:
    Houston TX, Yeeeehaw!
    I ask the pirates what they're doing here.
     
  14. west india man

    west india man Immortal

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2008
    Messages:
    9,119
    Location:
    Brazil
    I go to the roughest part of town and host a party there.
     
  15. Arrow Gamer

    Arrow Gamer America's Dictator

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2012
    Messages:
    2,057
    Location:
    The Business Plot
    I find a horse in the street and mount it.
     
  16. Tsoate

    Tsoate Prince

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2013
    Messages:
    538
    Location:
    The Shadows of your Soul
    I find a deadly crossbow.
     
  17. KaiserElectric

    KaiserElectric Total Freakin Besties

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2007
    Messages:
    3,454
    I run over Tsoate and get my suit pants back.
     
  18. Marcher Jovian

    Marcher Jovian Prince

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2013
    Messages:
    425
    I accept his offer and check to see that he isn't cheating.
     
  19. kill fire

    kill fire Enormous Midget

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    775
    Location:
    The cold, dark dungeons of Dredmor
    11: You have great difficulty following his bike, as it's considerably faster than your own. Still, you manage to keep him in your sights.

    15: They're mash-tastic. (+10 hp)

    1: As soon as you open your mouth to speak, you hear a fearsome "YAARRRRGH!" Suddenly, pirates attack you from all directions. You've been ambushed! (-4 to next dodge roll)

    ROLL TO DODGE!:6(2): The pirates surround you. They quickly pull you down off of Sir Reginald and begin to beat the living crap out of you. (-40hp)

    14: You host a party, but barely anyone has shown up. You feel as though there's more you could do to liven up this party.

    20: You find a horse standing almost eerily still on the sidewalk. As you attempt to mount it, a loud, mechanical voice calls out to you from inside. "I AM UNIT K-749, IDENTIFY YOURSELF OR BE DESTROYED." You comply, and the horse makes a dull humming noise for a few moments before responding. "SUFFICIENT. UNIT K-749 IS READY TO SERVE. ORGANIC LIFE FORM "ARROW GAMER" HAS BEEN GRANTED FULL ACCESS." Suddenly the horse transforms before your very eyes. You are now riding a chaingun-mounted, fully synthetic robot horse.

    19: Poking around in the bushes, you find what seems to technically be a crossbow. Really, it's been modified so much it's almost more like a high-powered sniper rifle that shoots arrows. You have no idea why such a thing was hastily stashed away in shrubbery, but you'd rather not find out.

    18: Spotting Tsoate rummaging around in some bushes, you step on the gas petal. Tsoate doesn't see you coming until it's too late. As he's flung over your windshield, he slides out of his pants, leaving them on your rear view mirror. (Tsoate -20 HP)

    12: You can tell that the bookie is an honest crook, and he would never even consider cheating in a game for money. He deals out the hand, but it ends up a tie. He offers to play another hand.

    18(21): As your crew assails mythmonster2, you leap into the air and cross your swords in an ancient, breathtaking five sword style maneuver. You dive upon the disoriented and defenseless Sir Reginald and unleash a relentless barrage of steel, perfectly executing the secret FIVE SWORD STYLE TECHNIQUE: PEGASUS SLICER! Sir Reginald is swept off his hooves, and falls to the ground a badly wounded mess of blood and hide. Your men are wowed once again by the strength of their captain, so much so that they are inspired to beat mythmonster2 even harder! (Sir Reginald is incapacitated, mythmonster2 -15 HP)

    You've had an unnatural amount of luck over the past few turns. You have attracted the attention of the Dice God. Tread carefully.


    The strange man, seemingly unable to find what he was looking for, has left the neighborhood.
     
  20. choxorn

    choxorn Watermelon Headcrab

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2006
    Messages:
    18,023
    Location:
    Honolulu
    Well, that worked even better than I expected! I'll try attacking both mythmonster AND Sir Reginald this time! I'll hit each of them with two swords and use the fifth for defense.

    FIVE SWORD STYLE: MYTHICAL SPINNING ATTACK!
     

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