Spanking in class - yeah or nay?

[Yeekim]

Biting a 4 year old so hard that it leaves marks is definitely not anywhere near the top of my list of accepted parenting methods.

Well, they were gone by the next day. Unlike my own, I might add.
But that drove the message that biting is not a nice game home spectacularly well, so...

 

[Zack]

It is shocking that this is legal, even for Texas.

TBH, I thought it was illegal. I've been in Texas public schooling my whole life (except for one 18-month period), and I have NEVER heard of any teacher, faculty, or administrator doing anything close to corporal punishment.

 

[LucyDuke]

WTH no

 

[King Kalmah]

Anyhow, to be honest, I wasn't afraid of spanking, I was afraid of my parents being disappointed and/or angry with me. That was what really scared me. Spanking? Bah, temporary pain. But parents who don't think well of you? That's a long-term shame. For instance, when I was a kid, I was always scared of going to my friends' house, bcause my friends had the "violent" video games (i.e., not rated E) that my parents wouldn't let me play, and I was afraid my parents would find out and be angry at me. This is the sort of thing that still troubles me to this day. I have a good relationship with my parents, and I can trust them with personal things if push comes to shove, but I really wish I could trust them even more, because I'm really just afraid of their reactions.

I guess you can say it worked for me. My parents didn't spank me unless I was really, really acting up, although I never really acted up. Sure, I was stubborn as hell as a kid, but I also was naturally passive and quiet, so I didn't really jump around like a hysteric when I didn't get my way. My brother, on the other hand, was the loudmouth. He was screaming the moment he was born, so my parents spanked him a hell lot more since he was not as well-behaved as I was (at least externally). Spanking, I have to say, didn't really work on him. He was even more stubborn than I was, and while I do know that he didn't 'like spanking, I guess his train of thought was "@#$% this I don't care, dad". Eventually my parents just gave up, and they're ironically sort of more lenient on my brother than I was. Although I have a much better relationship with my dad than my brother has.



. Then again it's good they gave me affection. Some parents are just really distant with their kids, and the kids are disappointed with their parents for that when they grow up(like my own dad, since my grandfather was a 'traditional' parent and all, being all aloof)

Parenting is quite hard, I'll say.

My dad was very similar...to your Grandpa I mean he worked long hours and had a very "hands off" approach which led to my mom dispensing the discipline.She came from a very Traditional eastern European family(they spanked you with what ever they had),but the worst was not when she hit me,but when she would tell me how I let her down or how I was such an embarrassment to the family.This stuff scars you deeper then any slap could...

I don't know,but I do think you hit something there...It is all about the children personality.

My brother was very independent and generally didn't care what anyone told him.(just like yours)He also got held back and while the lectures didn't help him(he didn't care) I still think whenever my mom hit him he'd take notice kind of like "oh I better behave to stop this crazy lady"....but yeah if you have a very strong willed kid spanking may work better I guess cause lectures never helped my brother.Just made him more stubborn

I think that if we as a society want to move forward we should have our kids looked at(examined early) so we know what they are all about(personality wise).When I was a kid I had therapy and we talked out alot of issues,but the core issue stuff was ignored since my dad was there and he deflected a lot of questions since he feared my shrink would see his bad parenting skills in action....lol

 

[Quintillus]

I dunno where in the conversation this is, but I'll add my own personal experience with spanking:

My parents spanked me up until I was in late elementary school or something (maybe middle elementary school, I don't remember). More so my dad, since my mom was more about the whining and nagging and so forth. To be honest, I preferred spanking. Sitting down and having my parents tell me over and over where I was wrong and where I had to improve myself and all that was just annoying at best and depressing at worst. Spanking, yeah, it hurt for me, but at least it was over in half a minute. Lectures were an hour or more. I find it odd, but for some reason I didn't really mind spanking too much when I was older and it didn't really hurt for some reason. Maybe I'm a masochist.

Anyhow, to be honest, I wasn't afraid of spanking, I was afraid of my parents being disappointed and/or angry with me. That was what really scared me. Spanking? Bah, temporary pain. But parents who don't think well of you? That's a long-term shame. For instance, when I was a kid, I was always scared of going to my friends' house, bcause my friends had the "violent" video games (i.e., not rated E) that my parents wouldn't let me play, and I was afraid my parents would find out and be angry at me. This is the sort of thing that still troubles me to this day. I have a good relationship with my parents, and I can trust them with personal things if push comes to shove, but I really wish I could trust them even more, because I'm really just afraid of their reactions. And they're not even really that "Asian". They're just really overprotective, I think. And I was just way too passive and obedient as a kid, and even now.

I guess you can say it worked for me. My parents didn't spank me unless I was really, really acting up, although I never really acted up. Sure, I was stubborn as hell as a kid, but I also was naturally passive and quiet, so I didn't really jump around like a hysteric when I didn't get my way. My brother, on the other hand, was the loudmouth. He was screaming the moment he was born, so my parents spanked him a hell lot more since he was not as well-behaved as I was (at least externally). Spanking, I have to say, didn't really work on him. He was even more stubborn than I was, and while I do know that he didn't 'like spanking, I guess his train of thought was "@#$% this I don't care, dad". Eventually my parents just gave up, and they're ironically sort of more lenient on my brother than I was. Although I have a much better relationship with my dad than my brother has.



So, basically, my point is, at least from my experience, spanking was neither bad nor good. It really depends on the personality of the kid. It's not just what sort of punishment better suits certain kids. It's hard to know exactly where the kids' trait-based problems are, but the punishment has to address that somehow, i think. It's also having to find a delicate balance between... you know, I don't know what I'm saying. I just wanted to throw out my own anecdotes, if anyone cares. My parents still showed me a lot of affection for me when I was younger, so I think that sort of helped, too. Or, actually, it also made me feel more guilty when they were lecturing me, because it made me feel really like I did something bad. Then again it's good they gave me affection. Some parents are just really distant with their kids, and the kids are disappointed with their parents for that when they grow up(like my own dad, since my grandfather was a 'traditional' parent and all, being all aloof)

Parenting is quite hard, I'll say.

Interesting. Although I don't have the breadth of spanking experience, I can identify with the trying not to disappoint my parents aspect. I cared about that more than I should have, or at least more than I should have longer than I should have. The overprotective aspect I can also identify with - although at least in my case, I think my parents did a good job of withdrawing from that as I approached/reached high school and completely so once I started college (and even when I was young, it wasn't drastically overprotective). Nowadays, I can see both positive and negative effects from that in myself - by and large I tend to think the positives are a larger factor. For a long time, the combination of some overprotectiveness and caring about not being disappointing worked well to ensure I developed good personality traits (particularly along the moral/ethical front), as well as good academics, but it eventually became an issue as academic competition increased and the same academic standards were no longer realistic.

Too passive I would say describes me, even to this day. Too obedient - I was definitely unrebellious for a teenager, but I think that was in large part because I didn't have a reason to rebel, and realized that even at the time. Still, I wouldn't say I was too obedient.

I agree with the King that you're probably onto something with it depending on the personality. I don't think that more expansive spanking would have been as effective for me at internalizing good behavior.

On the original topic, I voted No, except in private schools. But I voted assuming that the spanking would be without contacting the parents first, like in the 1950s. With parental contact first, it's a bit different, and I didn't actually have an issue with what happened in the article until the school didn't follow its own policy, which the mother clearly expected they would. Generally I'd still prefer if the school left it to the parents, however.

 

[kramerfan86]

Spanking is for the uncreative who either are lazy or lack basic critical thinking abilities to come up with a logical punishment.

 

[GoodGame]

"Maggie Gyllenhaal"

What the....I never!

Make it Sophia Vergara.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

"Maggie Gyllenhaal"

What the....I never!

Make it Sophia Vergara.

Your opinion will change once you see the movie.

 

[AlpsStranger]

Stop dissin' Maggie

 

[downtown]

TBH, I thought it was illegal. I've been in Texas public schooling my whole life (except for one 18-month period), and I have NEVER heard of any teacher, faculty, or administrator doing anything close to corporal punishment.

I think its pretty rare, even in the south...and I think its used primarily in, *surprise!* schools that are poorer and have more minority children.

 

[Farm Boy]

Spanking is for the uncreative who either are lazy or lack basic critical thinking abilities to come up with a logical punishment.

This is the response for the uncreative who either are lazy or lack basic critical thinking abilities to come up with a logical assessment of multiple and varied situations. <cheeky grin>

 

[GoodGame]

Your opinion will change once you see the movie.

It's a Youtube---mediocre. Don't try to tell me my opinion.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

It's a Youtube---mediocre. Don't try to tell me my opinion.

Sensitive much?
It was meant tongue-in-cheek.

 

[Ondskan]

So some of you are more in favor of lesbian spanking than not.
I must say that I voted prematurely.